Saturday, September 13, 2008

I Have a Secret Lover...

So.. I had been hearing about this to-die-for, soft, fudge in a jar... because nothing is better than eating directly from a container, off a spoon.


I resisted ordering.. it was a small, pathetic attempt at resistance but as they say .. resistance is futile. The company that makes it opens up a few day order window each month to gather orders and then a couple weeks later they call in the elves and make the batches to order and send them out.

So, I waited.. I stalked.. I wrote the order dates on my calendar. yes, seriously... I counted down until the company would deem us minions worthy and would allow me to plop my money on the counter and demand that they 'fudge me!'

Then, I waited three long ass weeks.... long, because, remember.. they make the batches to order so they must count their chickens and order the sugar and grate the chocolate ... and so.. finally, I get a hilarious email from the company telling me my spoon crack has shipped.... then it takes 4 long days traveling..... finally.. it's here!

I've met the devil and he is Spoon Fudge.

It comes packaged in 10 ounce plastic jars (I thought they'd be bigger but my ass is thankful they aren't) and they have a mini plastic spoon attached to the side so you can indulge right there by the mailbox, in secret, amidst the haphazardly discarded styrofoam peanuts, ripped apart cardboard box and packing tape. I do strongly suggest going into the house so the neighbors don't think you're out there snorting crack. It could really mess with your hard-earned reputation as the subdivision 'mean lady' if the kids see you with a fudge mustache.

The jar says "a little bit of heaven in a jar" ... it isn't heaven.. it's hell in a handbasket and it's going to my thighs!

It has no preservatives and it isn't shelf stable.. which is a very bad thing... why? You need to consume an unopened jar in about a month, an opened jar within a week.

Now, that isn't hard to accomplish.. in fact, I'm betting you could easily consume a jar in a couple days (because I have faith in you) and if you had no restraint, little willpower and no inner guilt.. or were in a severe PMS state you might be able to polish it off in a frenzied hour or two.

Also.... this ain't for sharing. Nope. The husband need not know of the goodness that sits in my upstairs office and faintly whispers to me like a secret lover.

Whoo! Ok.. got a little hot in here for a minute.

Back to my review... there is another small problem.... ... they offer flat rate shipping of $6.50 no matter how many jars you buy so a girl would naturally order up more than one jar as she's a smart shopper.. even tho said girl didn't need any more jars...

This girl ordered up the Chocolate-Peanut Butter and the Chocolate-Marshmallow-Caramel.

Good god almighty!

Spoon Fudge, you complete me.

It's so smooth! It's so creamy! What is this magic?

The complex flavor train in the C-M-C is crazy.. you taste chocolate, of course..... then the burnt sugar undertone of buttery caramel and then, finally.. the sweet childhood memory of marshmallow fluff. Stop. Me. Now.

The C-P-B is a classic representation of the world's best combo, truly... who doesn't love chocolate and peanut butter? It's chocolatey.. it's rich and sweet and sooooo bad for me. truly. I shouldn't eat it and yet, it satisfies.

They have lots of flavors to choose from - White Chocolate Peppermint Crunch! Banana Split! Chocolate Mint! If they ever made Amaretto, I'd have to kill myself.

Then, the damn company goes and does this 'punch card' deal where you buy 12 jars, you get one free.... then they taunt you on the website with the message 'Just 10 more jars and you get one free!" ... 10 more jars and I'm gonna need one of those Scooter store chairs to get around!

So.. in closing .... I can recommend Charssi's Spoon Fudge. It's an indulgence you should make at least once.. or maybe try each flavor so you can get a free jar.

Edited to add: The Spoonfudge makers are now going to offer two 5 oz jars instead of one 10 oz jar (beginning with the Sept order window) so that is great news! You can get two flavors! Make sure you click the link to see when the next order window will be.

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